This list is priceless!


* Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."

* Drum on every available surface.

* Sing the Batman theme constantly.

* Staple papers in the middle of the page.

* Ask 1-800 operators for their home phone number. If they don’t give it to you ask why they are calling YOU at home.

* Sew department store anti-theft detector strips into people's backpacks. (Awesome)

* Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.

* Set alarms for random times.

* Honk and wave to strangers.

* Dress only in clothes colored Hunter's Orange.

* Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.

* Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies.

* Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complementary mints by the cash register.

* ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.

* Pay for your dinner with pennies.

* Repeat everything someone says, as a question.

* Wander around the restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley. (Awesome)

* Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.

* At the laundry mat, use one dryer for each of your socks.

* As much as possible, skip rather than walk.

* Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read. (I do this alot though not on purpose)

* Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.

* Pretend your mouse is a CB radio, and talk to it.

* Name your dog "Dog."

* Ask people what gender they are.

* Reply to everything someone says with "That's what YOU think."

* Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back in the tray.

* Forget the punch line to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot". (i'll have to try this one too)

* Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with a can of Lysol.

* While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.

* Make beeping noises when a large person backs up. (Yes! soo good!)

* Leave your Christmas lights up and lit until September.

* Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.

* Mow your lawn with scissors.

* At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batatatatatata-suhWING-batter!" (I wanna do this one so bad)

* Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment. (TOTALLY AWESOME!)

* Never make eye contact.

* Shout random numbers while someone is counting.

* Make appointments for the 31st of November.